It’s hard to tell when my Spiritual Journey began. I tell others that my awareness of my Spiritual Journey began a few years ago. A lot of things were the catalyst at that time but, mostly, I think it was the feeling that I had ‘settled’ in too many areas of my life…not to mention that I could no longer ignore the gaping hole in me that felt like something important was missing. An old friend told me that I said to her one day, very seriously, “I’m going on a Spiritual Journey." Although words like that sounded nothing at all like me, she insisted. So, the drama queen in me has decided to mark that moment as the beginning of my search for purpose and meaning in my life…i.e. something to fill that gaping hole. I wanted to feel blissfully ALIVE again.

My adventure began gently by exploring anything that fascinated me and that I would have normally felt uncomfortable about. I spent a lot of time in centers for alternative thinking and "New Age” gathering places. In the beginning, it was overwhelming (and a little weird), to say the least. There seemed to be such a huge gap between living 'of this world’ with a normal job, friends and a little mainstream religion to top it off vs. delving head first into the vast sea of Spirituality. I was scared! Everyone in this alternative world seemed over the top and, dare I say, a bit out there. Was I really ready to live off the grid? At first, I was cautious…fearful of getting sucked in and losing all that I was familiar with. However, I stubbornly refused to let my fears create judgments about things I had yet to experience myself and proceeded to set forth walking at the edge of the 'Spirituality shoreline’, gingerly dipping my feet in and spending time learning about anything that struck my interest. Slowly and quietly, a hunger in me grew and I began to immerse myself more deeply in the exploration of more new perspectives. This may not be a big deal to many people, but I felt wild and free! I felt empowered and proud of this little bubble-gum, jimmy-rigged spiritual mission I had embarked on…all in the pursuit of discovering my life purpose and, ultimately, how to fill that empty space I had been carrying around within myself for the last 15 years.

Let me tell you, I explored everything and anything! Cutting-edge, radical new perspectives and long-standing beliefs. All the while, my daily mantra was a quote from Buddha-

“Believe NOTHING,
no matter where you read it
or who has said it,
not even if I have said it,
unless it agrees with
your own reason and
your own common sense."
-Buddha

That being said, the entire World was now open to me - there was NOTHING taboo! I explored Hare Krishna, Buddhism, yoga and yogis, tarot cards, meditation, Wicca, the Bible, energy healing, frequency of stones, the Tao, the law of manifestation, life after death, pendulum, aromatherapy, acupuncture, ionic, magnetic…..anything and everything that sparked an interest in me. It was beautiful and enlightening. So many outlooks wrapped in a variety of colorful words and interesting packages….who was I to say what was right or wrong?! In this buffet of information, I served myself a meal of everything that peaked my curiosity! It was the most satisfying 'meal’ of my life. I started to watch sunsets, sunrises, birds flying, clouds breaking, grass growing, people living……all with new eyes. Different books started to interest me…Louise L. Hay, Doreen Virtue, Don Miguel Ruiz, Paulo Coelho and even Chelsea Handler! When I ceased judgement of what was right and wrong, important and unimportant, I found a little lesson in everything and started to form MY TRUTH, based on things that resonated deeply with me.

As someone who has taken my first leap to explore new frontiers of Spirituality, I have a few suggestions for those of you that have decided to embark on your own journey to reconnect with yourselves and find your Truth:

1. Take time alone in peaceful silence and reconnect with nature regularly.
2. Explore things that are oddly intriguing to you or that you know you have irrational fears about…gently expanding your boundaries.
3. Select three priorities in your life and 'feed’ each of those things daily. For example, if your health is a priority, exercise 30 minutes a day. Maintaining priorities in your life helps you to maintain your balance.
4. Follow your heart. Our minds are important, but they will always keep you in your 'safe zone’. Nothing revolutionary is revealed in our comfort zones. Do what makes your heart sing!
5. Seek a person that you can relate to who is already on this journey, a spiritual mentor of sorts. After all, this new adventure can seem overwhelming at first. Be sure that you feel comfortable and supported by this person, rather than directed to be on a specific course. You are not looking for someone to put you on their path, but to offer you assistance as you begin to blaze your own trail.

If you’re feeling a 'void’, chances are good it’s not going to be filled with anything you’re doing now. Consider the option of adventuring outside of your comfort zone, in little ways (or big)…it may reconnect you with all the amazing things you are capable of! In my personal adventure, going through experiences which challenged my boundaries made me see a strength, courage and passion I didn’t think I had anymore….and this was my key to filling my void. Dare to open yourself up to a magical World and find your key.

It was a few years ago. I was single and back in the dating game….and, oh, what a hot mess the dating game had become since I was last in it. It seemed like everyone was playing a role and it was nearly impossible to figure what was real and what was not. I certainly didn’t want to make the same mistakes I had made in the past and I was looking for true love in my life this time. Why couldn’t I meet the right person?! What was wrong with me?! Something had to change.

And then, I saw it. A little statement that kicked me in the gut: BE SOMEONE YOU WOULD WANT TO MEET.

Literally, in a moment, it changed everything for me. I stopped sulking and whining about why I wasn’t drawing the right people and situations into my life. I was slapped in the face with the truth….change had to start with ME. What do we look for in a love partner? Someone that we have lots in common with and, often, lots of qualities we admire and aspire to. The person I was wishing to meet was the person that I wanted to be! It was time for me to look at myself in the mirror and figure out if I loved the person that looked back at me. A lot had happened to me over the years (as happens to all of us) and I had adapted, changed, adjusted, evolved, mutated into a compilation of real me mixed with a lot of make-the-world-happy me. How could I expect to find a certain type of person if I wasn’t that caliber of person myself? I wasn’t looking for a free ride…I wanted a partnership and that involved having something of value to bring to the table….a 100% authentic ME.

I see people all the time….I’m sure you have seen it too. Trying to be something they are not. Trying to make themselves something they think will appeal to others. People playing the game. WHY?! Are we winners when we trick another person into thinking we’re something we are not?! Seemed to me that we have two losers in a situation like that.

So, I stopped looking for Mr. Right and started a new mission…to make myself right! I was on a mission to find in myself a person I would want to meet. Anytime and anywhere, when faced with a challenging situation where I was tempted to act or speak in a certain way, I would ask myself first, “What would I think of myself if I stepped outside of my body and saw myself doing/saying that?” The answer always ended up being the “right” thing to do…it was respectful of others and myself. Now, let me be very clear. This process was not about me becoming someone else….it was about becoming the me I had always been, but had buried over the years for fear of being criticized, hurt or judged. The statement “BE SOMEONE YOU WOULD WANT TO MEET” immediately connected me with what was right for me to do based on qualities I value. It wasn’t always easy…but it always felt right.

I realized that it was never primarily about finding someone else with certain desirable qualities…it was about re-discovering those qualities in myself. I did the hard work and I was now someone I was proud to look in the mirror at again. I still wanted to have a special love, but there was no rush to fill any void with something or someone outside of myself.

Guess what happened next? When I least expected it and was no longer dwelling on it…magic! While hiking up a mountain trail alone one March day, sweaty and with no makeup, I suddenly found myself trudging alongside a very dashing and handsome man, quietly and purposefully climbing just like me. There were no pickup lines and witty comments….just two people struggling to get up the hill at their own paces (which happened to be almost the same). At the top of the mountain, we took a moment to savor our accomplishment and started talking….it was the beginning of something very special for me. My dream….I met the man that is the love of my life. I did the work, he did the work, we are both people that we would like to meet and we got our own little beautiful fairytale. It really happens….